When in high school, I was told that I should have a goal for my life, even if I don’t have a plan to get there. After a long time (months) of thinking about what I want in life, I came to the conclusion that I wanted to live a life that looks like it was taken directly from Pinterest. I don’t care if I am rich, I just want to be comfortable. I have worried about so many things during my childhood and even more now that I am an adult. I do not want to worry about money my entire life.
This desire to be financially secure has led me down a path of questions. What do I want to do? Where do I want to live? How much money do I have to make a year to be considered “financially secure”? Do I really want to do this? What about that? I have taken so many online quizzes and research based tests (I haven’t spent money yet) that are supposed to give me an idea of what I should do in my life. They always tell me I am an artistic person and I idealize my life.
In my head this sounds awesome. I would love to have a group of people I manage that I get up and running and then they become self sufficient and I do maintenance. OR I could see myself being a consultant that only gets things back in shape for companies. At the same time I would love to paint intense and abstract things and become a huge hit (Like this little girl). But there is always that voice in my head that tells me well, can you really get there?
Analysis paralysis. I think so much and I have an intense habit of over idealizing careers and then devaluing them when my mood changes. I have run myself into the ground by thinking and thinking for hours and hours about what I really want to do with my life.
For example, I just spent ten minutes looking at becoming a Professional Organizer (which actually looks pretty cool!) and now I want to become that. But I promise that by lunch I will be back to Human Resource or becoming a Painter.
So pretty much I am currently an unrefined hobbe who just needs to get it together (not really, but that is what I’m told!).
This really is super frustrating though! If you can relate, or have any tips for me, please share them in the comments section!
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